I can’t believe I’m already a month into my maternity leave. It’s flying by and I hate that. I feel like I’ve been in such a cloud recovering from giving birth and caring for a newborn and nursing 24/7 while taking care of two young children. It’s been a lot and I’m still in the no-sleep haze so it feels like a dream. I haven’t been able to really enjoy the kids or this time at home yet. It’s been mostly a lot of survival mode here, and I had really wanted my maternity leave to be filled with special memories with the kids. But that’s why I’m glad I waited to write down my maternity leave goals until after giving birth. I am trying to go easy on myself and not beat myself up for doing anything more than survive these first few weeks. It’s a big adjustment and having a newborn is no joke, but having a newborn and two others is a lot. And we have made some special memories like taking the kids to the Dinosaur Safari at the Bronx Zoo and Katonah Farms to name a couple, but there have also been many afternoons that I haven’t been able to leave the house and the TV has come on. It’s also been hard because we’re in the middle of the school year still, so a lot of our days are spent just trying to keep up with the routine. But I do want the rest of my leave to include some special memories and hopefully some trips, so I’ve made a list of maternity leave goals so I don’t blink and this time is over. After all, it’s rare to get this much time at home without work looming over me — even on vacations, I still have work worries and check-ins so this is a truly special time and I know it. With that said, my night job aka this blog and my Instagram is still demanding a lot of attention, so I suppose I’m not fully free of work and work worries. But here are my maternity leave goals for this time around.
Outline the Book I’ve Been Planning to Write Forever: I had high hopes of writing the entire thing over my maternity leave, but I want to cherish this time with the kids, and my brain is too cloudy from sleep deprivation to start right now, so I think an outline is more realistic for my maternity leave goals.
Get Back in Shape: Oy, I hate the pressure we are under to get back into shape after giving birth, but I’m making this one of my maternity leave goals, because I know it’ll be easier to do it now than once I’m back at work and commuting and juggling all of the work things. Plus, we’re trying to throw a move in there. I am going to start slow, and I’m breastfeeding so I’ll probably hold onto the final 10 pounds, which is annoying. But I do want to start working out (in some form, no marathons or ultra crazy classes here) at least 5-6 days a week to start. I’m also trying to get my insatiable appetite under control and curb the sweets, intake. It’s been hard because I crave sweets and am constantly hungry, which I’m sure (slash I know) is a result of breastfeeding 24/7 and not sleeping. I don’t think deprivation diets will work, so I’m going to focus on eating as cleanly as possible to help with the weight loss. Working out helps, but diet is the key to real weight loss (I’m not expert but that’s been my experience and I’ve heard time and time again from trainers and nutritionists). So I’m going to really focus on lean proteins and greens and fruits and trying to avoid processed foods and gluten, dairy and sugar. It won’t be fun, but I’ll be thankful when I have more energy to chase after the kids and am hitting up the pool with the kids.
Play Tennis Once a Week: I want to make getting back in shape fun, or I will lose momentum when I’m tired, and I love playing tennis. I didn’t play at all during my pregnancy, so I’m rusty, but I want to get back on the court. I love that it’s a fun way to spend time with friends and have some time to myself where I can’t think about the millions of other things stressing me out.
Find and Buy a House: This is so stressful and really making me go bonkers, but it sort of has to happen and is taking up a lot of time and mental energy so I thought I’d include in my maternity leave goals. We’re in the process of selling our current home and need to find a new place to live. I really want to be moved in and settled before the school year and end of my maternity leave, but I’m not sure that is going to happen. I hate all the unknown and chaos of selling and buying a home, but I know it will be worth it when we are settled in our new home and have a space that really fits our growing family and allows us to spend more time together just enjoying each other.
Take a Family Vacation with Just Our Five (will likely be the next one…): I want to take advantage of my maternity leave to go on a trip with just our little (or not so little) family of five. We’re going to take one with friends at the end of summer that I’m already counting down to, but I’d also like to enjoy a little trip as a fam to bond away from the chaos of every day.
Take Kids to Disney World: This will likely be our trip as a family of five. I really want to give the kids a magical experience after all that they missed during Covid and how hard it’s been to transition to a family of five and to live with a stressed mom and dad who are constantly making them clean up for showings and dragging them to open houses. I also need to get away — I feel like I’ve been grounded forever.
Shoot Content for the Blog Outside of Fashion: I’d like to include more interiors, attempts at cooking, and motherhood and life posts in addition to fashion. I need to plan more photoshoots, which is harder to do with lifestyle and home shots, but it’s a creative muscle I’ve been craving to flex. I’m hoping when the little one gets a bit bigger to have more bandwidth to do it.
Create More Reels and Lives: I want to do more on Instagram as part of my goal to grow the community there and to challenge myself creatively. I really haven’t had much time to learn and play around with the tools, and it’s a goal I have for this next month of maternity leave.
Learn to Cook at Least 5 Meals: I know this is always on my list, but I really need to step it up in the kitchen. We do way too much on takeout, and I hate that I don’t know all the ingredients that go into it. I really want to learn five healthy dinners I can have on rotation that both me and the kids (and hubs like) as well as a few easy lunch options that I can make for myself.
Spend 1:1 Time with Each Kid Each Week (even if it’s just 15 minutes): I know that giving the kids more quality time and being more present will help with behavior issues, but it’s been hard when I’ve been distracted by the baby and exhausted. They have been needier than ever and I’ve had less to give and it’s been a vicious cycle. I think I need to build in 1:1 time or it won’t happen. I’m going to try to do it in small ways — walking them home from school and stopping for a snack, a lunch date, a trip to the grocery store with just them and mom, etc.
Be More Present and Put Down Phone With Kids More: Ugh this has been hard even though I’m on maternity leave from my day job. I’m realizing how much I rely on my phone and how distracted I am as a parent when I’m on it. I hate that. I know it’s sending the kids a message that they’re less important than whatever is on my phone, and I feel terrible about that. I am trying really hard to put away my phone in the mornings and when the kids first get home from school and then from dinner until bedtime.
Bring Back Weekly Date Nights with the Hubs: We haven’t had a date night since welcoming Brooks, which is totally understandable, but I think we’re ready to get back into it. Whether it’s with another couple or just us, I really want to carve out that time when we’re not trying to talk over the kids to be out just us adults. I think for the first couple, we’ll probably bring Brooks along, but that’s fine.
Take Kids to Legoland: There is one not too far from our home, and I know the kids would love to go. It would be such a special treat for them to do one weekend.
Take a Trip to the Hamptons: It’s my goal for us to make at least one trip to the Hamptons every summer (and eventually I’d like to buy a second home there but we need a new main home first). This is our happy spot, where Andy and I met, and where so many of our friends spend time during the summer, so even though it’s always hard to make happen with summer rentals being so crazy these days, I really want to make at least a few days out East happen this year. Maybe for Andrew’s birthday?
Plan a Fun Fourth of July: I think we’re going to split our time between the lake and home as our club has lots of fun things going on, but I want to make sure to pack the weekend with fun activities and make it a truly memorable fourth.
Purge and Clean Out Our Home: I really want to get rid of all the excess and get organized and pare down our things in anticipation of our move. I’m actually overwhelmed by all our stuff, and there’s no better time to get it under control. I’ve been slowly chipping away at it and it feels good. It’s funny how much better I feel the less stuff we have.
Launch Closetful of Clothes Consign: I had hoped to get further on this before the baby arrived, but alas, this is now one of my maternity leave goals. I am really excited by this idea, so hopefully, you’ll hear more on it soon.
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